Today, my boys and I tackled the job of raking leaves. I love these kinds of projects, where I can include both boys.
As we were working away, something occurred to me….my boys think I’m pretty awesome. I don’t mean this in a conceited or prideful way by any means. The fact is that I’m their dad, I love them, I protect them, and I’m present. For these things, they look up to me.
The whole being “present” thing is what really sunk in….
When my wife and I found out that we were having our first boy, I was nervous. I was worried about all of the skills and talents that I didn’t have. I was worried that I wouldn’t be the manly example that my son needed. I truly questioned my adequacy as a father. Maybe that’s a normal thing, I don’t know.
6 years later, I now have two sons and I’ve discovered a very important lesson: my boys don’t need me to know everything to view me as a superhero….they just need me to be present. That’s it. I need to be around, involved and full of love and support….always.
In their eyes, I’m the protector of the universe, I can fight off the bad people with a simple flex of the bicep, I can fix the most complicated problems and I can put batteries in anything! That’s what they want and that’s what they need. A dad who is around and a dad who would give anything to protect them.
All of the skills, abilities, schooling, money or toys don’t matter…..none of it matters………if there is not the love, attentiveness and consistency that a father should provide for his children. This has been quite a relief for me. The reason is because it doesn’t matter how I was raised or what I know or don’t know. What matters is the condition of my heart and how that directly reflects in the way that I lead my sons. That’s the good stuff.
Day by day, with God’s help, I will continue this awesome journey of being a dad/superhero. Flying, x-ray vision or spider webs may not be my strength, but I’m here, with open arms, walking in-step with my son’s lives. I’ll settle for just being “Dad” for now…ok, Daderman is cool too.
What’s a good dad / father-figure look like to you?